Hype Reviews
by Mikey M. Hype
Summary: Homage to "Bum Reviews". A bum with only a webcam and a laptop reviews fanfictions. Tonight's Review: Author Fighters: Mortal Kombat...
1. Spiderman 4

_And now it's time for Hype Reviews with Mikey M. Hype._

_Tonight's Review…_

_"Spiderman 4" by Eddie Kennedy_

I burst onto the scene, excitedly, as I shouted…

"OH MY GOSH! This is the GREATEST fanfic I've ever read in my life!"

"There's this guy called Peter Parker, but he is also known as…SPIDER-MAN! And I'm like…"

"Peter Parker is Spider-Man? I didn't know that! But then again, I also didn't know that Darth Vader was Luke's father, or that Homer Simpson was bald."

"So, Spider-Man lives a very happy life with the people he loves. His best friend is dead, his aunt is dying of cancer, and his girlfriend the redhead reminds him of it every minute of every day."

"I wish MY life was that good!"

"Oh, wait, no I don't. Because NOBODY wants that type of situation!"

"So, Peter's Aunt is dying and she's like…"

"My last words to you are 'marry that redhead'." I paused, then said in a cheery voice, "Well, that's all I needed to say. Good-bye." I then fell to the ground as a flatline sounded.

"So, Peter Parker forgets his aunt's death in under a week and a Spider-Man villain shows up: Adrian Toomes…or Brody at least one time in the fic. He's the Spidey villain known as VULTURE!"

"Isn't it easy to connect Adrian Toomes to Adrien Brody? It is SO easy to connect an old man in a bird suit to that movie star from 'Predators', Peter Jackson's 'King Kong', and 'The Pianist'."

"So, Spider-Man fights Toomes only to get his butt kicked by Felicia Hardy also known as BLACK CAT!"

(WRONG)

"That's right, all you comic nerds! In this fanfic, Felicia Hardy ISN'T the cat burglar with lots of cleavage and the catsuit. Instead, she's this unimaginative ripoff of the Vulture."

"I was a ripoff of the Vulture once!"

"I got my pants sued off…literally."

"And so, the Vulturess beats up Spider-Man, who is trying to stop Vulture from robbing a bank. And Spider-Man is like…"

"I'm Peter Parker."

"And the Vulturess is like…"

"My husband is stealing that money because our kids are sick and we need the money."

"Oh. I've heard that line from many other people before…" I said, imitating Spider-Man. I thought for a bit, then say, "Okay. Off you go."

"Hooray! Instead of stopping crime, Spider-Man just lets it go! MORE superheroes should be like that! It would be paradise with people stealing, killing, kidnapping, and all kinds of good deeds!"

"But I digress…"

"So, there's this other guy named Curt Connors, also known as LIZARD! And for some reason, he has his lizard powers without any transition and does stuff similar to a very bad video game."

"Ah, explanations. Who needs them?"

"So, Curt Connors becomes the Lizard in front of millions of people," I toned down and became a bit more analytical, "which would probably ruin his reputation, cause people to deem him as 'dangerous', and earn him a spot in the slammer."

"WHO CARES? Lizard is AWESOME! He doesn't need explanation!"

"So, Spider-Man fights the Lizard, and I only say this because the fic only says that he fought him."

"HAH! '300', 'Return of the King', and any Star Wars movie, EAT YOUR HEART OUT!"

"So, Spider-Man runs into Vulture again only to be stopped by Black Cat-I mean, Vulturess! And he's like…"

"Vulture's stealing again. I have to take him in this time!"

"NO!" I said in a high-pitched, girly voice, "He's stealing for our sick kids!"

"Wait, didn't you already tell me this story?" I asked, imitating Spider-Man.

"Yes."

"And your husband is rich enough to make this suit, but can't help your kids' health?"

"Yes."

"That makes no sense…off you go."

"Wow! Superheroes are such good role models. Don't do anything about crime and let them go so long as they have a good backstory. Whether or not they're lying is entirely up to you."

"So, Lizard takes a piece of symbiote from Spider-Man 3 and a bit of Spider-Man's costume and gives it to this guy named Kletus Kasidy, also known as CARNAGE!"

"Yes! Carnage is finally in a Spider-Man movie-fic! IT IS ABOUT FRIGGIN' TIME! I don't care if he wasn't relevant to the story and came the heck out of nowhere! People LOVE THIS GUY!"

"So, Peter takes the redhead out and pops the big question."

"Are you having my baby?" I asked, then thought again, "Oh, wait. Wrong question. It's 'Will you marry me?'." I gasped in shock.

"But it turns out that Vulture, Carnage, and Lizard are working together and go right in and are like…"

"We all know that you're Peter Parker, but we'll just kidnap your girlfriend instead of just killing you right here."

"That's right! Rather than eliminate a threat to their power, they just blackmail him for a convenient plot point and just kidnap the redhead!"

"I kidnapped a redhead once!"

"She was dressed in spandex, worked for a guy wearing an eyepatch, and kicked my can after forty-two seconds. Oh, and she was named after a spider."

"So, Spider-Man goes to the Vulturess, even though he has no idea where she lives, and recruits her to go after the villainous trio."

"So, they have this HUGE, under-dramatic fight scene and all the bad guys die! Except for Curt Connors, who isn't the Lizard anymore and acted like the Lizard was some kind of symbiote…TRULY HE MUST BE A COMIC FAN!"

"And then Peter Parker marries the redhead and they ALL live happily ever after." I said, then noted, "Even though I was kinda hoping he'd dump her until she learned to be a bit more sensitive or just go for someone else."

"So, I really liked this fanfiction! It's just like Quest for Camelot, only you STILL don't know what's going on! More movies should go without description and ruin important characters to the franchise, like Neverending Story!"

"What? They did that twice? Never mind."

"This is Mikey M. Hype saying…CASH!" I said, picking up a cup and rattling its contents, "Ya got CASH? Oh, c'mon! The sign says 'Will Review for Cash'! C'mon, CASH! Can you at least help me fund Spider-Man 5?" There was a pause before I asked, "Whaddya mean 'Sam Raimi's not doing them anymore'?"

_Seriously, though, Spiderman 4…sorry, it takes time to properly sugar-coat a response for this fic._


	2. War with the Zodiacs

_And now it's time for Hype Reviews with Mikey M. Hype._

_Tonight's Review…_

_"War with the Zodiacs" by Nukid_

I burst onto the scene, excitedly, as I shouted…

"OH MY GOSH! This is the GREATEST fanfic I've ever read in my life!"

I stifled a laugh before beginning the review. "This fanfic is SO FUNNY! It's like the funniest fic I ever read!"

"So," (snigger) "So, there's this group of people called the Author Fighters and they fight against these beings called 'Darksides'."

"Oh, the look on their faces when they realize how many times THAT name's been used on fanfiction!"

"So, the Author Fighters go to this museum where they hear that the Darksides are going to raid for this artifact." I laughed a good bit, "I mean, where it came from or what the heck people are doing in possession of these dangerous artifacts never came to mind. THAT adds to the comedy!"

"So, they beat up all these 'Jake Long: American Dragon' guys until this other guy named Nukid comes in. And..." (snicker), "He beats them all up even though there are like a bajillion of them in one place!"

"So, this one Author Fighter hits him with that stare from Ghost Rider. And Nukid is like..."

"Huh. I've seen the worst."

"PFFBTH! It's funny because he claims to have seen what's beyond death and that all his beliefs have been proven false! NOBODY would be cool after that!"

"So, the leader of the Darksides, named after a Duck Dodgers villain is like..."

"I have become God, even though in other fics, I am the lowest of the low and, in a sense am not God who created something from nothing."

"So, he creates these Darksides from his blood and they all look like various animals of the Chinese Zodiac."

"What inspired this, a placemat at a Chinese Restaurant?" I ask with a laugh.

"And so all these Author Fighters do battle with a few of them at first, but all the while, Nukid keeps getting in their way while promoting Trigun, No More Heroes, and loads of other pretentious stuff!"

"So, he goes around and he's like..."

"Superpowers and weapons are for lame idiots like you, even though I can do things no real human can do and sort of have powers in future fanfictions. Oops! SPOILERS!"

"Then we also get this flashback that takes you away from the story to rub his ego. Oh, and he has a girlfriend who is killed." I laughed, then said, "Oh my gosh, that's been used a ba-jillion other times and it's STILL hilarious to read!"

"So, there's another girl and Nukid's all like..."

"Life sucks because my girl died." I said, sounding overly-emo.

"Y'know, I'm her sister." I said in a more feminine voice.

"Really?" I said, sounding more hopeful.

(Pretending to make out with someone)

"What follows is several chapters of the Author Fighters going out and fighting all these animals until this other. And, for some reason, the author thinks that the strongest animals are the monkey, snake, and rooster."

I chuckled. "How on earth does someone think that something without limbs, a chicken, and a hairy creature that scratches its butt all day be the most powerful animals in the Zodiac?"

"So then this super-powerful Darkside comes in and starts beating the crap out of one of their 'strongest teams'."

"And they..." I stifled a laugh, "And they beat him with a team attack, even though all of them barely did anything in the past before! OH MY GOSH! THAT'S HILARIOUS!"

"So, we go on to the stronger members of the Zodiac and, when Nukid reaches the rooster fight, he..." I held in a laugh to regain myself, "He starts writing this admiration for the guy fighting him! Gay humor at its BEST!"

"Before all this, Nukid is having nightmares about some villain painting bloody pictures and his name is..." I held up a hand as though saying "hold on", trying to get the laugh out of my system, "OLDKID!"

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! OH MY GOSH! This guy's trying to be all serious, but being so STUPID!"

"And then Nukid goes to fight the monkey and gets manga/anime cliche #489: UNEXPLAINED POWER GAINAGE! He's now twice as strong as he used to be without ANY transition!"

"So, after getting beat down by the monkey a little, he has this vision that goes into ANOTHER cliche! A message from beyond the grave! AH-HAHAHAHAHA!"

"And so, the now-inspired Nukid takes down the monkey and fights the head of the Darksides who's supposed to be a whimp elsewhere and he's like..."

"I'm a humble and just author, but I can fight this guy to a standstill (maybe even have an advantage), thus making you all SAPS!"

"But Drake tricks him and extracts Oldkid..." I coughed to hide a laugh at the name, "And Oldkid is all like..."

"Religion SUCKS! And that's what Nukid thinks. Don't let any other words fool you!"

"Ah, unfair religion bashing! What would media be without you?"

"And so, three MORE super-powerful Darksides show up and beat up even the strongest members of the Author Fighters! And what do they do? Vow to get stronger in one year so they can beat them!"

"And so," I held in a laugh, "Nukid, he..." I held in another one, "He pulls another cliche while trying to be cool and JOINS THE AUTHOR FIGHTERS!"

I burst out laughing at the end. "Like we ALL didn't see THAT coming! Oh my gosh was that funny! I mean it! War with the Zodiacs is the FUNNIEST fanfic EVER! ONE HUNDRED STARS! IT'S..."

(beep)

I peered at my laptop. "Oh...hold on a sec..."

(Please Stand By)

"Okay, I have just gone through twenty-nine E-mails telling me that I'm stupid and that War with the Zodiacs is NOT a comedy. It is, in fact, an anime-like epic fanfiction...I am most be-doozled."

I scratched my head in confusion. "Really? There are people that take this seriously?"

"O-kay, this is the greatest ANIME-LIKE EPIC fanfiction I've ever read in my life!"

"I can see why people call this one of the greatest works out there! It trash-talks religion for no real reason other than the sake of it and EVERYONE loves it when people do that!"

"Except for 'Golden Compass'..."

"The 'Clash of the Titans' remake..."

"And...anything by Richard Dawkins."

"And the whole dang story is the hero's fault and people love THAT in media!"

"Except for 'X-Men 3'..."

"James Cameron's 'Avatar'..."

"And anything having to do with 'Twilight'..."

"And it's nothing more than an ego-rub for the creator and EVERYONE loves it when people do that!"

"Except for Christian Weston Chandler..."

"Tommy Wiseau..."

"Uwe Boll..."

"And just about every self-insertion fanfiction."

"But it also includes lots of anime and video games which...just about every crossover fanfic has done!"

"And it's filled to the brim with hypocrisy...which has gotten TONS of hate among fanfiction-goers."

"And it talks up people in a very confusing and somewhat-wrong way...Lord KNOWS if anyone likes that!"

I paused, tapping my chin.

"Why do people think this is the greatest fanfiction ever? All this came from some of the WORST movies, books, comics, and games out there!"

"Hmm..." I thought, then an idea hit, "Oh, wait, I KNOW! Many people like this because of the mindlessly-fun action scenes, the inclusion of their self-inserts, and its resemblance to anime. It's not like it needs an enjoyable story, less-pretentious themes, and worship of one's self and beliefs to be true and that everyone else is stupid."

"This is Mikey M. Hype saying...CASH!" I said, picking up a cup and rattling its contents, "Oh, c'mon! The sign says 'Will Review for Cash'! C'mon, CASH! I can make a fic like this only ten times as pretentious and ego-rubbing...What? He already DID IT!"

_Seriously, though, the guy blatantly insults his friends, talks himself up and doesn't shut up when someone points it out, and is the cause for this whole freakin' mess of a storyline and people actually think this fic is good? He didn't take into account the members of his team who are religious, have inserts that use powers and weapons, and instead wastes time making himself look like God? The hero should feel guilt for starting this whole freakin' mess of a story, but no, he's too stupid or too into his own image to feel that. He needs to get help fa-man, I write too much._


	3. The Biggest of Lies

_And now it's time for Hype Reviews with Mikey M. Hype._

_Tonight's Review…_

_"The Biggest of Lies" by Kasuto of Kataan I_

I burst onto the scene, excitedly, as I shouted…

"OH MY GOSH! This is the GREATEST fanfic I've ever read in my life!"

"There's this boy named Link, and there's also this girl named Zelda, and both of them are having this strange dream."

"What is it?"

"It tells them that these golden Triumph Forks aren't what they think they are!"

"OH MY GOSH! Golden, majestic silverware isn't what I thought it was!"

"So, after a dream, Link talks to this green-haird girl while Zelda talks to her guardian/nanny, whichever you prefer. And they offer them comfort."

"However, elsewhere, these archaeologist guys uncover a strange, black pyramid-thingy that emanates a strange, unplaceable aura. If that is a bad sign, I don't know what is!"

"Then these strange guys called 'The Guardians' come in and are somehow able to read the language that the pyramid has inscribed on it. And they're like..."

"I am sorry, but we must take possession of this pyramid." I said, deepening my voice to a sagely level.

"Sorry, but this is pure research and..."

I slipped on a pair of sunglasses, then pulled out a neuralizer before flashing it.

"And the guardians take the pyramid away and it is NEVER SEEN AGAIN."

"Until later in the fic, though."

"So, Link goes to Zelda's birthday party where he gives her handmade gifts, and all the while, I'm like..."

"Hey, you remember that pyramid that the digger guys found? That was weird."

"Don't worry. After Link and Zelda have a time out on the town-it's not what you think it is-one of these strange guardians comes up to them and says..."

"I'm not kidnapping you, but I am right to believe that you will come with me if you want to save the world."

"Oh, okay."

"So, with the help of the guardians' magic, they're able to stay out longer without attracting attention and the guardians take them to their headquarters. And they're like..."

"This black pyramid we found will try to destroy the world. Because you are the Hero of Time and Princess of Destiny, only you can find the thing necessary to destroy it."

"So...no pressure?"

"Yup."

"So, the lead guardian takes Link and Zelda to see the REAL Triumph Forks and there, these three goddesses speak to them and say that the pyramid houses a dark entity and that only they can destroy it."

"After that, Link gets geared up and warps to the location of these magical balls."

I blew a kiss. "Good-night, everybody!" I said, imitating Yakko.

"Where are these orbs? They're at the freakin' SOUTH POLE!"

"So, Link finds the orbs, but kills a monster and is injured and cold to the point that he can barely move. Fortunately, the leader of the guardians is there to help him and he gets him to the safety of a much warmer climate."

"Now, the time has come and Link and Zelda have to destroy the black pyramid. And the evil spirit is like..."

"Don't destroy me! I will grant your every wish if you serve me!"

"But Link and Zelda are like..."

"No way! You're practically the devil. So, just die, already."

"Oh, okay." I said, then vanished in a puff of smoke.

"So, the evil entity is vanquished, but it makes the pyramid EXPLODE!"

"I made a pyramid explode, once!"

"I'm never allowed back in Egypt for desecraction of tombs."

"And one shard of the pyramid is about to hit Link and Zelda, but Old Man Leader saves them by letting the shard hit HIM instead. And he's like..."

"I'm sorry, but I can't let either of you die. Please say good-bye to my ex-girlfriend for me. I know she's old, but just tell her."

"And so the guy dies, but the Goddesses say that, because the evil spirit is vanquished, people can join them in the Sacred Realm."

"Boy, this is spiritual stuff, isn't it?"

"And so, Link knocks on the old lady's door and-THE END!"

"Don't you just LOVE cliffhanger endings? They always leave you wanting more! More story, more explanation, and a bit more continuation."

"So, I really loved this fanfic, especially the moments of true childhood innocence. Even though, in later fics, the author will kind of shift his image of immortality. But STILL, it's a must for any fan of nostalgia."

"This is Mikey M. Hype saying...CASH! Ya got CASH? Oh, c'mon! The sign says 'Will Review for Cash'! C'MON! CASH! I'm saving up for a Master Sword because that pig at the butcher shop is giving me weird looks."

_Seriously, though, "The Biggest of Lies" is a pretty good read for fans of the ZeLink pairing and of childlike innocence conquering evil._


	4. Skatoonyfan's Toy Story

_And now it's time for Hype Reviews with Mikey M. Hype._

_Tonight's Review…_

_"Skatoonyfan1234's Toy Story"_

I stood in front of the camera, looking absolutely disgusted.

"OH MY GOSH! This is the WORST Fanfiction I've ever read in my LIFE!"

"This guy needs HELP! I mean, serious, SERIOUS help! He thinks that the whole world loves Thomas the Train Engine, Backyardigans, the Mr. Men Show, and all sorts of dumb, kiddy material! Take in the fact that he's almost a young adult and it adds even MORE to insult him about!"

"This Skatoonyfan guy has some of the WORST casting ever! He cast a Danny Phantom villain as an iconic Toy Story character, who is supposed to be a HERO? And how on whatever this planet is did he connect a steam engine with a racecar? Just because it has a face on it does NOT mean it's the same!"

"And he's going around, finishing this fanfiction in just ONE DAY! It took me longer to think up this review, write it down, do a double-take, and then put it on the internet. I'm just a bum who lives behind a McDonald's Dumpster and I can do better work than this guy!"

"And he takes all these characters from dozens of movies, cartoons, video games, and many more and says that they're supposed to all be TOYS. This is WRONG in the sense that, when most people think of Toy Story, they prefer to think of the characters as TOYS that no one can replace with ANYONE!"

"NO, I do NOT buy the whole 'action figure' or 'stuffed animal' excuse! Toys from TV or video game franchises will NOT be remembered as things to play with! They will be collectible figurines by the time puberty hits!"

"And all these toys are so freakin' hype-o-critical! They're supposed to be worried about getting new toys and getting replaced, but suddenly show joy at what their owner gets on her birthday party!"

"He's also friggin' inconsistent! I mean, one sentence, Buzz's stand-in is Vlad Plasmius and the next, he's that speedy kid from 'The Incredibles'!"

"And he also throws in all these unnecessary characters in places where they're not needed! He only puts them in for the SAKE OF PUTTING THEM IN!"

"Also, him throwing in references to other, more successful fanmake writers adds NOTHING to the story! It's basically saying..."

"I suck. Read these guys' works instead. At least they're consistent!"

"And his original jokes consist of only toilet humor! I DO NOT THINK POTTIES ARE FUNNY! I DO NOT THINK CHRONIC GAS IS FUNNY!"

(fart)

(laugh track)

"SHUT UP! ALL OF YOU, SHUT UP!"

"The thing that really ticks me off is that he puts SWEAR WORDS into a fanfiction that's supposed to be rated K+. I am serious! I read that stuff when I was a boy and LOOK WHERE IT GOT ME! It is NOT (bleep) GOOD FOR ALL THESE (bleep) KIDS!"

"This fanfiction sucks EGGS! I admit to thinking that stuff is the GREATEST FANFIC I EVER READ IN MY LIFE!"

"But even I KNOW this is bad when I see it! Skatoonyfan, YOU ARE A HACK! And the sooner you realize this, the sooner you can find better things to do and find better fanfics to read ant take example from!"

"Like Spiderman 4!"

"Spider-Man! Spider-Man! Does whatever a Spider can!"

"This is Mikey M. Hype saying...CASH! Ya got CASH? Oh, c'mon! The sign says 'Will Review for Cash'! C'MON! CASH! Can you at least give me something better to read? This one's still stuck in my head and I need to drown it out with something else!"

_Seriously, though, "Skatoonyfan1234's Toy Story" consisted of everything you SHOULDN'T do in a fanmake._


	5. Modern Day

_And now it's time for Hype Reviews with Mikey M. Hype._

_Tonight's Review…_

_"Modern day" by awesomelicious_

I sprang in front of the camera, bouncing in excitement.

"OH MY GOSH! This is the GREATEST Fanfiction I've ever read in my life!"

"First of all, I want to say that this fic is in the first-person narrative, told from the perspective of-"

"There's this fire-bending guy named Zuko and he has all these friends from the 'Avatar: The Last Airbender' universe."

"Except this fic takes place in the modern day. How do I know this?"

"Because it promotes mp3 players and My Chemical Romance songs!"

"I had an mp3 player with My Chemical Romance once!"

"I had to sell it for gas money..." I said, sadly, then wiped a tear from my face.

Going back to the excited voice, "So, after an argument over pop-culture songs, they go to this shabby-looking school and that blind earth-bender is like..."

"We could totally fix this school up, but I don't want to because it'll be crap-tacular anyway."

"GREATEST EXCUSE EVER!"

"By the way, this is something called a Zutara fic and it shows. Zuko and Katara start getting hots for each other. Any transition as far as the eye can see?"

"Nope."

"GREATEST ROMANCE EVER!"

"So, after an ambiguous day at school, Zuko goes home to his sister, who's a jerk, and his father, who's an ABUSIVE jerk. Why? Because it's supposed to make the story ANGSTY!"

"I WAS ANGSTY ONCE!"

"I was concerned if I'd EVER be normal after that 'My Immortal' fic..."

"Did I also mention that there is swearing in this fic? Even though Avatar: The Last Airbender is a kids' show?"

"I have had it with all these (censored) Benders in this (censored) Nation!"

"So, Katara and her grandma heal him up, but Zuko has to go to his job as soon as he's healed up!"

"Why don't I have a job? I'm good at all kinds of things! Like sleeping, giving people diseases, consuming food and drinks, doing drugs..."

"So, Zuko goes onto this bus and Sokka is like..."

"Hey, we've decided to fix the school anyway, even when one of us said it wouldn't be worth the effort."

"Great."

"So, go to school, never see what they do in the school, unexplained romance, fix the school, gripe about injuries in Zuko's mind..."

"WOW! Such a complex fanfiction!"

"So, Zuko goes home after...fixing up the school, I guess, and his dad gives him his traditional burned-eye look!"

I looked at the fic a little more, then exclaimed, "WHAT? He doesn't have an eyepatch! That's MY idea of a burned-eye look! Why don't people see that anymore?"

"So, his friends see his scar and they're all like..."

"What could have happened to cause this? Money?"

"No..."

"Gangs?"

"No..."

"Drugs?"

"No..."

"Sex?"

"Yes-I mean, no..."

"And so Katara is like..."

I blew a kiss and asked, in a feminine voice, "Care to tell me now?"

"It was my father." I answered, immediately, in a masculine voice, "Oh, and he killed your father in a car accident."

Pretending to be Katara, I slapped someone off-camera, "BUG OFF!"

"But then in the next chapter, Katara comes back and is like..."

"Sorry about that." I said in a feminine voice.

"It happens." I said, imitating Zuko, "By the way, I don't know what to do; go live with relatives or turn my father in."

"But then the EVIL, abusive father comes in and he's all like..."

"TAKE THIS!" I pretended to crack a whip, "And as for YOU, girly, I don't know you, but I'm sure YOU'RE a jerk!" I cracked the whip again.

"So, Zuko wakes up in a hospital and it turns out his uncle, Iroh, who he said lived far, far away, actually lived close enough to save him!"

"I wish MY uncle would save me! He lives in California and is one of the richest people in the world, so what's taking him so long to get here?"

"So, Zuko's getting showered with love and I'm like..."

"Hey, you remember his father? What happened to him?"

"Ah, who cares about consistency? As long as these two characters are sugary, I'll be satisfied!"

"So, it turns out Zuko's father has recently been arrested and, after the grand re-opening of the school, the fic is like..."

"Well, fic's over. Hope you enjoyed the show. It's only filler from here."

"So, as you can tell, I REALLY like this fanfiction, even though the characters should have been fleshed out and, from what I hear, the pairings were VERY different..."

"WHO CARES? Zuko and Katara will definitely forget the bald kid and the emo chick and get together!"

"But I digress."

"This is Mikey M. Hype saying...CASH! YA GOT CASH?" I said, holding up a cup and rattling its contents, "Oh, c'mon! The sign says 'Will Review for Cash'! C'MON! CASH!"

"Wait, what's this...? What's 'Legend of Korra' and who the heck is Sgt. Reynol?"

_Seriously, though, "Modern Day" was about as deep as a kiddy pool. And people are STILL shipping the Zutara pairing even when it was shown that Aang married Katara and had kids?_


	6. Mortal Kombat

_And now it's time for Hype Reviews with Mikey M. Hype._

_Tonight's Review…_

_"Author Fighters: Mortal Kombat" by airnaruto45_

I burst onto the scene, excitedly, as I shouted…

"OH MY GOSH! This is the GREATEST fanfic I've ever read in my life!"

"There's this guy named Airnaruto, and he along with a few friends have been invited to the MORTAL KOMBAT TOURNAMENT!"

"I wish I could be invited to a Mortal Kombat tournament! But all I get is a chance to run for president!"

"What a waste..."

"But there are also these bad guys who are invited to the tournament as well as DOZENS of characters from books, cartoons, anime/manga, and video games. And, get this, the author changes the character roster, uses the same characters multiple times, and kills off beloved cartoon characters."

"You know, FOR KIDS!"

"What follows can be summed up like THIS..."

"These guys are fighting..."

"This cartoon character is fighting..."

"This character is fighting, even if he's not a fighter..."

"Naruto and Sasuke are fighting in a manner similar to Star Wars III..."

"More characters die..."

"Yeah, these are some of the BEST IDEAS EVER!"

"So, everyone fights and stuff happens until it's down to Air and that black-and-yellow guy from Mortal Kombat. And the reader is like..."

"This is Airnaruto's fic, I already know what's going to happen."

"So, the fic has an epic anticlimax as Air defeats the Mortal Kombat guy. And, as winner, he gets three wishes granted. And he's all like..."

"I wish all the dead players were revived except for one in particular..."

"Uh-huh..." I said in a booming voice.

"I wish that my opponent's people were restored, but not as zombies or condemned souls."

"Ooh! Way to be specific." I said, impressed.

"And I wish that the guy killed by a certain Shao Khan..."

"KHAAAAAAN!"

"Hey, you all saw it coming, I just did it!" I said, pointing my finger.

"Anyway, I wish that Shao Khan's murder of one guy never happened."

"Is that it?" I asked in the booming voice.

"Yep." I answered with a nod.

"No great tragedies you want to take back?"

"Nope."

"No limitless supply of anything you want?"

"Nope."

"No gifts to your friends, family, or a life you could have lived?"

"Nope."

I paused, then shrugged and pointed my index finger.

(POOF!)

"WISHES GRANTED!"

"So, I REALLY liked this fanfic, even though it could have been a lot deeper and use a lot more characters that are REAL warriors instead of cartoon characters made for the entertainment of children."

"But I digress..."

"This is Mikey M. Hype saying…CASH!" I said, picking up a cup and rattling its contents, "Ya got CASH? Oh, c'mon! The sign says 'Will Review for Cash'! C'mon, CASH! I'm founding a Mortal Kombat Tournament of my own! Oh, wait, it's not a tournament, it's just a viewing of the movie and 'Annihilation'."

_Seriously, though, AF: Mortal Kombat could have been much better, but I guess it could have been a lot worse, too._


End file.
